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Self-doubt is a sneaky itch that throws us off our game and keeps us from what we want. Be it the career recognition; the levelled up business that is financially successful or the relationships we want. Self-doubt wants to keep us tight in our comfort zone, keeping us small and afraid. There are many ways it shows up in our lives from procrastination, the nagging doubting voice, the inner mean girl, the perfectionist, the good girl who is stuck playing nice and seeking others approval over her own. Getting stuck comparing your life against the world and her friend. For me, I have been plagued by the perfectionist, the inner mean girl and a good level of I am not-enoughness. Here are five tips for stopping the self-doubt heifer from stopping you winning in 2021.

 

Question the Noise

Self-doubt is quick to drag in the nagging naysayer, who wants to cut you down by reminding you of every failure you have had in the past. Telling you that you are not \”Good Enough\”.  It can put you in a tailspin, stopping you from taking actions on your goals. When this shows up, \”Question the truth of the information\”. Ask questions such as

1)           Is it true?

2)            Can you absolutely know that it\’s true?

3)            How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?

4)            Who would you be without that thought?

 

These questions are from Byron Katie\’s four questions technique.

 

Separate Your Intuition from Self-Doubt

We tend to listen to the voice that speaks within us on autopilot, not spending the time to decipher who is speaking. Is it our Intuition/Inner Voice/ Higher Self or the sneaky Self-doubt?

How does that voice make you feel? When that voice speaks, do you feel supported, celebrated and championed? If yes, that is your Intuition/Inner -voice/ Higher-self whispering to you. If the voice makes you feel heavy, undermined and anxious. That is the voice of your doubt working hard to keep you in your comfort place, afraid to step out.

 

Embody Your Avatar

Another way to side-step Self-doubt is to step into the version of you that is the future version of you—the you who has attained your goals and is looking back at tasks she has accomplished. You are tapping into your own fierce wisdom which quiets self-doubt. Think Beyoncé, who steps into Sasha Fierce before she hits the stage to work her magic. Sasha owns the room and knows that she is the boss and not bossy and speaks for what she wants without hesitation.

 

Thou Shall Not Compare

Self-doubt would have you comparing your work in progress against someone else\’s showreel. Leaving you feeling not enough and inadequate. Stop! Breathe and start by looking at what you have accomplished, what unique qualities you bring to the world, look at the lives you have touched just by being you. Suppose you are struggling with this reach out to your bestie, your trusted peer and ask them to review you and see your greatness unfold before you. Write each one down and store in a jar and pull one out whenever the feeling of comparing flares up.

 

Break the Good Girl Curse

The \”Good Girl\” The one who is afraid to speak up for what she wants, as she doesn\’t want to come across as bossy. The GG needs to be liked. That she would not speak up when colleagues would claim her ideas as theirs because she doesn\’t want to create conflict. Kick out the \”Good Girl\” and ask what would my \”Future Self\” do?

This year and subsequent years, it is time to say enough! Time to break up with self-doubt and step into the woman you are becoming, and you are ready to be supported to become your future self. Connect with me for a quick 15-minute chat to uncover the tools that can help you thrive in 2021.